Sinful
by Uchiha Yumi
Summary: Being twins doesn’t mean having a clone of yourself. Hitachiincest, Shonen Ai, Yaoi, Kaoru's POV


**Author:** Uchiha Yumi

**Title:** Sinful

**Genre:** Angst, Romance

**Summary: **Being twins doesn't mean having a clone of yourself. (Hitachiincest, Shonen Ai, Yaoi)

**Rating:** T/M

**Parings:** Hikaru x Kaoru

**Main Characters: **Hitachiin Hikaru, Hitachiin Kaoru

**Special thanks:** A special thank to Lilya-chan and FunnyNeko, for reading and correcting all of my nasty stuff.

**Disclaimer: **be sure that if I owned them, they would be fucking like wild animals all day…

**Notes: **English is not my native tongue. Please tell me about my mistakes!

First fiction in this fandom.

The song quoted is "Malchick gey" by t.A.T.u

**SPECIAL DEDICATION!!!**

**My dear Auntie, my unique Taichou – I wrote it just for you! You made my cross the line dividing my perv mind from this fandom! GAAAH! **

**Cheer up, life's beautiful! Even more when Hitachiin brothers are around and having sex…**

**I love you!**

**Yumi-chan**

_**SINFUL**_

****

_Handsome  
Tender  
Soft  
Why do you look right through me ?  
Thinking  
"No"_

I looked at him and he looked back at me, smiling.

It was like seeing a mirror beam. The picture is enough alike yourself to catch your breath but still too…imperfect to deceive your trained eyes.

People usually think that being twins means being two identical parts of the same apple, a sole and bound set of feelings, emotions, tastes. They always see the astounding similarities, ignoring the little but present differences.

Hikaru is my brother. He's not my clone.

Although almost no one can see it, there's a remarkable gap between us.

If we were really that alike, there would be Hikaru and Kaoru.

But we're not.

There is Hikaru and _the one who's not Hikaru_.

There's a leader and a follower.

There's a lover and a loved.

But that was to be expected. Nothing in this world is perfectly indistinguishable. Nor nature nor men can achieve that. There are many stones and trees and animals that look similar. There are many clothes in our mum's atelier sewed and designed in series.

But similar and identical aren't synonyms.

And they will never be.

_I can't deny my feelings growing strong  
I try to keep believing  
dreaming on_

I leant forward and kisses his rosy lips, hugging him close. His body is warm and his hands brush carefully and softly on my smooth skin. I snuggle closer and melt into his heat.  
He welcomes me with a happy sigh and kisses the top of my head. I laugh a little.

I must look like a kitty sleeping at his master's feet.

And maybe that's what I really am. A faithful, furry kitty to cuddle at night, a useful appendix of Hikaru's body. But I don't really care. I was born in that position, I'm used to it.

Probably because we've never had a good relationship with the outside world. It was a sort of equation of our existence.

There's Hikaru and the one who's not Hikaru. And there's us and the outside world.

A huge crack that couldn't be filled in a million of years. Let alone in the brief time of our life.

It was us and us alone, a two-ways relationship.

When we were kids, we used to call it playing.

When we went to middle school it was complicity.

When we entered high school we finally labelled it as love.

_And every time I see you  
I crave more  
I wanna pull you closer  
closer  
closer  
closer  
but you leave me feeling frozen_

We never really knew if things would have been different if we had been more opened to the _others_, if we would have found girls in our class appealing, or boys in our sport club hot.

We were used to each other and we fell in love with each other.

Sinful or not, it's not our fault. That's simply how life forced us to be. And then, as long as we love each other, the rest shouldn't count too much. Girls find it cool, even and boys wouldn't pronounce about it anyway – the line between pretending and reality is too thin for them to really tell if we are truly in love.

If they only saw us, all sweaty and tangled in our bed at night, if they only heard our moans when Hikaru slips inside of me and fills me so fully and warmly, maybe they'd stop wondering and would simply feel disgusted.

'It's like having sex with yourself! Like screwing your own reflection!' they'd say. Blind fools.

Fair enough, their opinions wouldn't count anyway.

_Choking back emotion  
I try to keep on hoping for a way  
a reason for us both to come in close  
I long for you to hold me_

"Ohi, Kaoru…?"

Hikaru's voice is nothing but a whisper. I look up at him.

"Mmmm?"

"You look troubled tonight. Something's wrong?"

I shook my head "No, really….I'm fine"

He kissed my lips, his thumbs rubbing my cheeks. I squirmed a little, my brother's juices still drying between my legs.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, sure – don't worry"

He nodded, his arms engulfing me. I smiled

"I love you, Hikaru"

"Love you too, Ka-chan"

"…Hey, don't call me Ka-chan!"

"Why not, Ka-chan?" he mockingly smacked my ass and I yelped.

"You bastard!"

Everything's rightful in war and love, right? I started tickling him and we rolled all over the bed, Hikaru laughing and wriggling as if there were bugs on his body.

But he deserved it all. I hate being called "Ka-chan", even if just in private occasions.

"Please, please, I beg of you! I'll stop saying that!"

I paused and leant over, my lips panting just a few inches away from his.

"Just because you are you, Hikaru!"

He smiled and pulled me down for another searing kiss.

Sinful or not, I couldn't live without him.

_Owari_

* * *

_Little Poll: would you like this poor authoress to write more about Host Club or should I just focus on my other fandoms? (Bleach and Naruto)_


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